April 4, 1987

On April 4, 1987 I was 20 years old and about to embark on the journey of a lifetime. That journey was becoming a wife. At 20 I am not sure I fully understood what I was diving into, but my heart led and my feet followed. So, here I am today at 43 years old and celebrating our 23 wedding anniversary. So many times I hear people say, "I married my best friend" I don't think I did that. My husband has his own friends and I have mine but I did marry my soul mate. I married a man that is my complete opposite. I am outgoing, attempt to be funny and congenial and generally like people. Byron is quiet, always suspicious of other peoples motives and is perfectly happy to set for hours in the woods and ...Think! I tend to think more with my heart than my head.
Our first meeting was rather odd and most of you know the story...Byron was working on memorial day weekend at the egg farm and I drew the short stick and had to work in the office at the farm that day. A load of chickens had just come in and while unloading the carts of birds, Byron was "run over" by a cart. I was elected to drive him to the hospital where the diagnosis was a broken collar bone. Byron was married to Candy, my friend and co worker and they were expecting their first child. It appeared they had it all. A twist that no one could see coming did, when a drunk driver crossed the center line and killed his wife, unborn daughter(Allison), and hunting partner "Tar" his black Labrador. His little cousins life was spared, saved by the body of Tar shielding her from the impact. Shock is not even close to what we all felt that day and many days, weeks and months after. It was an unimaginable tragedy. Byron and I became friends and spent some time together never really imagining that someday we would marry. He dated other people and so did I. Then one day out of the blue, I looked and him differently and he did the same towards me. We were engaged in October of 1986 while on a trip to Miami Florida. Family members on both sides scoffed and said it would never last. Some said it was too soon and others said we were marrying out of grief. Like our marriage would somehow console us. Looking back I don't know that I would do anything any differently. Yes, I was young and had many things in life to consider but becoming his wife was one of the happiest days of my life, failing in comparison only to the birth of our two beautiful girls.
We have been through so much in 23 years. The births of our girls had to be the most proud moments, the death of my parents and a brother and the passing of Byron's father probably the most despairing. Purchasing our own home (which we did 20 years ago on April 4th) was the most exciting moment. We have built a business out of nothing but the dirt we owned and today own and operate the largest, most respected boarding kennel for miles around. It certainly has not been an easy journey to this point but we made it...TOGETHER. Never did we throw up our hands and walk away. We choose our battles carefully. There are many things that I do that annoy my husband and vice versa, but it is what we choose to do battle over and how we react to those battles that makes the difference.
We are different. Byron loves to be outside, close to nature. He loves to stay up late and get up early and really doesn't care what anyone thinks about him. I, on the other hand, go to bed early and sleep late whenever I can. My idea of nature is the beach, on a blanket, watching people walk by and I worry way too much about what people think of me. I guess what it all boils down to is marriage is what you make it. Along time ago Byron and I decided the MOST important people in the world were the 4 that resided in our home. I am not saying that extended family is not important, they are, but we don't get caught up in the drama of what everyone else is doing and find it is best when they don't get caught up in our family. As our children grow and are becoming adults I hope that we have taught them and set and example for them to carry into their own marriages and relationships. I know that Byron will probably never read this post, he hates computers, but if by chance he does read this I want him to know that I will love him forever with no conditions!  You truly are the love of my life!