Talkin To Terry

Facebook is all the rage now and for years I never understood what all they hype was about.  I spend all day at work in front of a computer and the last thing I want to do when I get home is spend more time there.  When talking to people (in person) they would say, "hey, I will FB you", no they couldn't "FB" me because I didn't have FB.  It was almost as if I had to be ashamed that I was not a facebooker!  I would cringe when I saw the question coming and would literally try to dodge it!  Anyway, after years of dodging the facebook question I broke down and created my page!  To my surprise, I actually look forward to getting on the computer and finding out what is happening with friends, family and complete strangers!  I know, thank goodness my mother didn't hear that one!  My kids made me promise that I would not friend request their friends~but agreed that if their friends made the request of me I could accept.  I have held fast to this rule and surprisingly I do have several of their friends on my friends list.  I have had a great time catching up with people that I haven't seen or spoken to in years and that is where this post is heading. 
I have caught up with my best friends since kindergarten, Lisa and Mary, friends that I went to college with, Susie, Sarah, Katie and Cathy. And that is just a few of the people that I have been able to "spend time" with.   I have been able to share stories with them, allow them to meet my family and meet theirs as well.  It has been a true blessing to reconnect with so many people.    One of the people that I have reconnected with is a high school classmate named Terry.   Thinking back to 1984 I try to recall if we were friends, acquaintances, or just two people who went through public education together.  My first thought is that yes, we were friends but I don't recall really ever spending anytime with him.  Terry has a twin brother, Todd, that seemed to have a much bigger personality than Terry's.  As I set and think about the two of them I remember that Terry was the quiet one and Todd...well, was not!  Everyone seemed to like Todd, he was outgoing, funny, a real people person. I remember being very intimidated by Todd.  Maybe it was just the difference in our personalities but I just remember hoping I never had to meet him in the hallway by myself because you just never knew what he was going to do or say.   Terry on the other hand had his group of friends and really didn't seem to waiver too far from them.  One day while on facebook, Terry just popped up on chat and we began the typical "catch up conversation".  I have found out so many things about him and I kick myself for not taking the time to get to know him better all those years ago.  It seems we were brought up in two very different types of homes. Mine was loving, warm and a true comfort zone and his was more unstable and uncertain.  If I had only known then, what I know now I would have worked harder to have made him part of my circle or I would have tried harder to be a part of his.  Terry told me the other day that he remembers coming to my house to get a bunny for his niece, something I had no memory of. What was even more amazing is he described my home down to where the rooms were when you entered.  He was only there one time but he recalled the layout of my childhood home perfectly.  He said he remembered the huge fireplace and meeting my mother and feeling the love that was inside the walls of that house and he was right.  He only met my mother that one time but he was right about her too.  Full of love and never judgemental, that was my mother.  But, as kids go, we seem to judge too harshly on things that now just don't seem to matter.  I guess being a grown up has its advantages and being able to see past stereotypes and social groups is one of them.
This blog is for you Terry, I hope you read it and know that I feel truly blessed to have reconnected with you!  God Bless you my friend!

Happy Birthday Sister!

Today is a special day! It's my sister's birthday! Happy Birthday Mary Kathleen! I LOVE YOU!

My sister is an extraordinary woman. Four years older than me she was always my caregiver and while I don't remember it I have been told that she cared for me from the moment I arrived home from the hospital. The story as our mother would tell it went something like this...."I was standing in the kitchen cooking supper and turned around and there was Kathy, coming down the hallway with the baby. I froze afraid if I yelled at her she might drop Karen. I said to Bob...don't yell at her, just get the baby!" At four years old she loved me and while we have had our moments, I am certain that she loves me still today. Recalling fond memories of growing up with a sister is easy. I remember how she would take me down in the floor and dangle and spit wad over my face...gross I know...but it is one of those memories. I remember go shopping with her at "Clothes Quarters" one of our all time favorite places to shop. We would also shop at Value Village which normally included a trip to McDonalds for those new chicken nugget things! Thats' right, I remember when Mcd's introduced the now famous NUGGET! Another favorite memory of mine was sharing a bedroom with her. There is nothing quite like sharing a bedroom with a sister. We would lay in bed at night and play the "radio game". No one else ever played this game because we "invented" it! We would also watch TV in bed using both an imaginary TV and remote control! Time passed rather quickly and I remember her in high school. She was popular, well liked by her friends and teachers. Kathy was the stats keeper for the football team and I think she may have even done some time keeping swim times for the swim team. I remember her getting ready for dances and proms and wishing I were as grown up as she was. Right out of school she went to work for a local fertilizer company. She did well there and truth be told her job kept our family afloat at times. I loved this time of our relationship because she was "grown up" and I wasn't. She would spoil me with those Saturday shopping trips to Lafayette and she always bought so that made it more exciting for me! She met the man that would become her husband and the best things that came from that relationship is her two beautiful children Kurtis and Caitlyn. Her marriage ended and that was a rough time but she is a strong, determined woman and she was not bound to let a failed marriage hold her down. She picked herself up and started all over again.
We often joke that we are so different yet so much the same. I do not deal well with the big things in life. Things like death of family members. Kathy on the other hand was with both my father and brother when they took their last breaths. That is how she is. I would describe her as TOUGH. She knows what needs to be done and then deals with the situation head on. Now, with that being said, do not let her lawn mower break down or let her get cut off in traffic because she does not deal with those day to day things at all! I would say "crap, the mower isn't working" but she would be much more descriptive and probably use language that would rival a sailor!

The loves of her life are her children. She adores everything about them but what mother doesn't? Raising the kids on her own gave her a special bond with them. Probably more with Cait than Kurt because he was a senior in high school when the marriage ended. Caitlyn truly became her best friend and that friendship continues today. Our relationship continues to grow now that we are both grown. We are better friends now than we ever were then and our friendship continues to grow daily. I love you sister and that will never change! Happy Birthday!

Make a Difference Monday

Today is Monday and I won 227 million dollars in the lottery! I began thinking of ways to disperse my good fortune and I want to share just a few of the places that will be benefiting. First the mortgage company will be happy to hear that I will be sending a check to pay off my home. My sister will also be happy to hear that I am sending enough to cover hers as well! Ashley and Tony just received that new home they have been dreaming of complete with a herd of cattle, goats and that horse that Ashley has long wanted. Lena has received the new Chevy Avalanche to drive on rainy days in Evansville and also the Corvette convertible for those sunny days! I have given enough to the church to cover most any need that will arise and know that they will use the money wisely to benefit many people. Along with the church, the White County Ag Association is receiving a check to build the "Ira Hedges Memorial" rabbit barn, something Byron has wanted to do for a very long time. Prairie State Christian Service Camp be endowed funds to refurbish the buildings on the grounds and purchase any additional land that they may need. Milligan College will also receive funds for a scholarship program as well as the University of Southern Indiana, which will be used to benefit someone that might not otherwise get the opportunity to attend college. I am not certain if the water wheel is still in buffalo creek but if it isn't I'd like to see it put back in! Monticello Youth Football will be able to fund several scholarships this year with money that will be provided to them.....This is just the beginning of my Make a Difference Monday!

Wait,, what? It was a dream....I didn't win the lottery? Well the list will have to grow longer until the day actually comes and I am able to do the above and so much more! This is what I would do given the opportunity! Hope you had a make a difference moment. Ashley and Lena did...they adopted 2 kittens from the shelter today! Welcome to our family, Tyler and Myron!

Mothers Day

Mother's day is right around the corner and I am faced with those conflicting feelings that come with the holiday.  I LOVE being a mother.  The joy that our girls bring to my life is one that I find difficult to put into words.  I feel like I grew up with Ashley.  I was young, just learning what being a wife and mother was all about when she came along.  I often wish I had been a little older when I had her because I had a tendency to try to be more of a friend to her than I did a mother.  Certainly regretful but thankful at the same time that the Lord blessed me with such a wonderful child and now beautiful young woman.  Lena came along a little later and I had begun to figure out the whole parenthood scene.  I am certain that I treated her differently than Ashley.  I think I pushed Lena a little harder, expected more from her and never gave her an inch, knowing that if I did, she would take a mile.  Lena told me a few weeks ago that she never remembers getting spanked as a child but she remembers Ashley getting spanked.  SHE WAS A QUICK LEARNER!  We rarely had to discipline her because she was quick to learn from her older sisters mistakes.  I have said it before and I will say it again, our girls are the joy of my life.  I pray for them every night when my head hits the pillow.  I pray for their significant others and I pray for their children which haven't even been born yet.  I pray that God will richly bless their lives financially, spiritually and emotionally.  I cannot imagine life without our girls and I want them to know how blessed I am to have two of the most fabulous young women on the face of the earth in my life.  I love you my babies, and yes, you will always be my babies! 
I lost my mother when I was 24 years old.  She never had the joy of getting to know the girls and sadly enough I don't feel like she even really knew me.  I had only begun to become a woman when she passed and I just hope that she smiles when she looks down and sees what I have become.  I miss my mother more than words can say.  She was not a "flashy" mother.  Never worried about how she dressed or if she was good enough for people.  Oh, I wish I had picked up that characteristic from her.  She was truly a fabulous woman and the hurt that I feel is so very deep when mothers day rolls around.  Every year I make that trip to the cemetery to see her and the tears flood from somewhere deeper than my eyes.  It is my soul that aches when I am there because I just want so badly one more time to be held in her arms and smell that lovely scent that was her.  You see, this is where the conflict is.  I love being a mother but I dread "mother's day."  This year will be different  I am not making that trip to the cemetery because I am going to travel south to spend the day with our girls.  I will however think about my mother and pray that she knows how very hard life is here without her.  I love you momma and I hope that you save a place for me up there.  I never fear death because I know that you are waiting with that silly grin and southern charm that I miss so very much.  Happy mothers day to all you Mommy's out there, may you be blessed by your children.  Hug them tightly and remember you can NEVER say I love you too often.

Happy May

So hard to believe that a month has passed and I have not blogged anything. The month of April was one filled with many exciting things. The true end of winter and seeing the plants shoot up out of the flower beds is something that I always look forward to. The hostas are back, as well as the roses, lilacs, lillies, and several different grasses! Nothing blooming just yet but the lilacs are about to burst any day and I am so excited.

Ashley blessed us with some exciting news in April as well. She and her boyfriend of 4 years have decided to get married. Tony gave Ashley a "golden egg" for Easter which contained a beautiful engagement ring. She is very excited and we are for her as well. Wedding planning is something new to me as I haven't been involved in the planning of a wedding for 23 years (our wedding)! The tentative date right now is 9-10-11. I know, I know but at least it will be an easy date to remember! Colors for the wedding, Black and White, accented with Burnt Orange. Nice for a fall wedding and burnt orange is Tony's color so at least he has been given some input! Wish me luck as I make the journey through wedding planning and becoming an "in law"! I am certainly going to need any advice that I can get so don't be shy~let me know what you think!

Lena is about to finish her first year of college and we are so happy and proud of her. Seems just like yesterday we were planning her graduation party from high school! TIME Flies! She has decided to take a job at Burdette Park in Evansville for the summer, working in their office. She is super excited about the job and we wish her the best of luck. It will certainly be different for her as she is used to carrying large trays of food to people and tending to their every need. Sitting behind a desk, spending time on the phone and getting her feet wet in a different type of customer service will be priceless experience for her. I will say I am a little sad that she is opting to spend the summer 5 hours from home but it makes sense that she would want to be in Evansville with her friends and sister. I am hoping that she uses her organizational abilities and gets her sister fired up on planning a wedding!
Well, that is about it for now! I promise to try to keep up better with my posts.
HAPPY MAY TO YOU ALL! Enjoy Spring!